Snappy Answers to Stupid Questions

So what kinds of dumb things do you hear when you are walking around with a world-class, Olympic-medal caliber black eye?

What happened to the other guy? My answer: We are waiting for the coroner’s report.

Who did that to you? My surgeon, and I had to pay him for it.

How did you get that? I saved the free world, but I can’t tell you more than that or I’ll have to kill you, too.

However, usually I answered seriously, that I had had minor surgery on my eye and had bled a lot.

Actually, many, many people were very sympathetic. Customers at the store, especially my regulars, have continued to ask after my health. One little girl at the store was extremely solicitous. She wanted to make sure that it didn't hurt and asked me at least three times if it did. Very sweet. Another regular, Mary Jane, gave me a prayer card and put me on the prayer list at her church.

The eye, as you can see from the photo, really looked bad, but did not hurt too much. It was more of a dull ache.